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God-lover, singer, poet, writer, single-mother, friend.

Tuesday, June 29, 2010

Not Mine to Fight

Dearest One, most high above, I pledge my heart afresh. I bend my knee before you. Take me, fault and failures all, and make me into something bright and gleaming for your sake.

I love you, God most high! I worship you alone and I shan't fear what man can do. Set me a table before my enemies and lead me out. Lead me to that higher ground. Let truth be on my lips though lies abound around me. All my battles I have not won and I've been broken - but here's a battle that's not mine to fight. So now I kneel in full surrender. Do what you will, only let truth prevail.

Artwork: The Vigil by John Pettie

Monday, June 28, 2010

One Voice Missed

"So, is it a heart-ectomy she needs?"
"No, no, her heart is the one thing that she does need."
"Then what can be done?"
"It's being done already."
"It is? I see nothing happening, nothing stirring. Does her heart still beat?"
"It does; but she does not know it."
"So what is it that you say is being done?"
"Something that the eye cannot see . . ."
"Himself! That is what you mean - It's Him that does the work!"
"Yes, He himself is working on her at this very moment."
"I cannot wait to see her rise; I've missed her song."
"So have we all. The cloud of witnesses has been waiting to hear that voice again."
"Is one voice missed so much?"
"Very much."

Artwork: The Anatomist by Gabriel Cornelius Von Max

Wednesday, June 23, 2010

Pieces of the Dreams

There's a tiny piece. I see it glistening in the sun. And there's another - just a tiny chip, a bit of color buried in the weeds. It's time to find them all, all the pieces of the dreams that I once held. And then to fit them back together, that's the task! That's the harder thing. To make them dreams again!

But I can do it . . . I think I can.

Yet first I must find all the pieces. It will take time; they flew in all directions when the shattering took place. There's another . . . and another . . . pretty little pieces. One day I shall find them all and I shall hold a dream again.

Artwork: La Primavera by Walter Crane

Monday, June 14, 2010


I see you are not alone. Holy Spirit, that tender precious one, has come to rest with you, to sit beside you and to sing.

You were meant to be a songbird, dear one! But until you find your song again that faithful comforter shall sing. He shall sing into your heart the healing words you need to hear. He will not leave you - not even for a moment.

In sleep or tears or rest, he shall stay happily near and sing . . . for so he loves to warble over wounded hearts.

Artwork: Love's Messenger by Marie Spartali Stillman

Friday, June 11, 2010

Where Hope Awaits

I looked further out today. I stretched my gaze beyond the thrashing waves around me, out as far as I could see . . . I saw the calm. I saw the waters smooth as glass. I saw the rays of sun gleam down to make the seas shine silver.

So that is where I'll steer my course - out there beyond where hope awaits. But this time I'll not be at the helm. I tried to steer my life but I got lost and went off course. So now I give the helm to God.

He shall steer me to the hope that lies beyond.

Artwork: The Bow Image © Magda Francot

Wednesday, June 09, 2010

A Battle in My Head

Shhh - it's time for hospital. It's time for rest. I look to find my healing in the only place I know to look: the cross. But how my head it hurts! From all the thinking, the confusion, and the anger that has wracked me good.

I lost myself in him whom I had trusted and now a battle rages in my head, a noisy clash of jealousy, love and pain that fight against each other. Betrayal is a cruel thing.

But, shhhh. Quiet now. Focus on the One who loves me dearly. I must remind myself of this and daily keep reminding: one day healing shall come . . . healing shall come . . . healing shall come . . .

Artwork: The Ecstatic Virgin Anna Katharina Emmerich by Gabriel Cornelius von Max

Monday, June 07, 2010

In the Wood

It is quiet. Too quiet. I hear my thoughts far too well. I cannot see a glimmer here. I've entered into the wood that none would choose to be, but where many find themselves. It is the place of heartache and longings unfulfilled.

"I am here. . ."

What was that? Are we not alone when we are in the wood? For in my shattered state it feels so and I find myself questioning the truths I once held strong. What dear truth it most certainly would be if He is near the brokenhearted . . . even in the wood.

Artwork: East of the Sun © Kay Nielson

Thursday, June 03, 2010

A Glimmer

"There! Did you see that?"
"What? See what?"
"Over there, there it is again. Did you not see it that time?"
"I think I did. What is it?"
"I am not certain . . . but I think . . . I think it is a glimmer."
"A glimmer? What's a glimmer?"
"A glimmer! You know . . . a tiny glimmer of hope."
"Yes, yes, I'm certain of it now. I've seen that kind of glimmer before. Quick! There's one up there! See?"
"Ahh, yes, I saw it that time. So that's what hope looks like."
"Oh, yes, that's exactly what it looks like - if you've got eyes sharp enough to see it. Not many have, you know. Not many can see a glimmer."
"I can see why. They rather sneak up on you, don't they?"
"Yes, they do."

Artwork: Fireflies © Daan Michael Hoekstra